


It's Like Wearing Your Heart On Your Sleeve, But Different

by PennamePersona



Series: Clinic AU [12]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Asexual Character, Clinic AU, Demi Characters, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Humanstuck, M/M, Mutliple sexual and romantic orientations, Trans Calliope, Trans Characters, Trans Dave, Trans Karkat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-08
Updated: 2015-10-08
Packaged: 2018-04-25 09:51:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4955737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PennamePersona/pseuds/PennamePersona
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It all starts in the family joke shop. </p><p>Then somehow, it becomes so much bigger. </p><p>A tale of purposeful pride and relationships.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's Like Wearing Your Heart On Your Sleeve, But Different

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so I might have to come back and adjust stuff, but I wanted to post this! It's based on a passing idea that I grew kind of attached to, and also happens to be a good way to show some other characters' orientations.

It starts while you are working at the family joke shop.

Some hooligan comes in, arrogance in his walk, and you sigh internally. People like this come in sometimes, but it isn't usually worth making any kind of trouble over. Best just to wait it out.

Jane is been in the back, taking stock, but you could call her up if he decides to be an issue.

He looks around, rolls his eyes at the merchandise, and finally selects a buzzer ring. It's a newer model, smaller and more subtle. He places it on the counter and leans against the top.

"I heard the most ridiculous thing the other day," He says. "I figured someone who works at a joke shop might have a laugh with it."

"Oh really?" You ask, anticipating something at least mildly offensive.

"Yeah." He rolls his eyes again. "This moron was saying something about being asexual. I mean, how dumb does that sound? Like, what are you, some kind of plant?"

...

Well, that just won't do.

"Hey Jane," You call back. "Come up here for a sec."

"What is it, John?" She asks, popping her head out of the back room.

"I just need a witness quick." You say, then turn back to the hooligan. "As it happens, you're wrong on three counts. First off, I really don't think that's funny. I don't even think you're funny! I think you're kind of a jerk. Secondly, plants reproduce sexually, so that was not a very good comparison. And thirdly, as it happens, I'm asexual. It's a thing, and you have no right to invalidate someone else's identity. So! If you could please leave, that'd be great! We don't want the business of closed-minded people like you. If you change your mind and widen your perspective, maybe do some research, then you can come back and buy your buzzer ring. Until then, I'll keep it under the counter for you!"

You grab the ring and put it under the counter in an open space. The hooligan stares at you, and then his eyes narrow.

"Listen here you little fag," He says, one finger coming out to point at you.

Jane steps up and puts you behind her.

"That is an unacceptable insult and will not be tolerated in this establishment. Please leave now or I will be forced to take more extreme measures." She says, face deadly serious and terrifying in the way that dear Janey is, when she wants to be.

"Whatever." He says, glaring at the two of you and walking out. Coward.

"Thanks, Jane." You say, smiling easily. You wouldn't mind this being brushed off, and you know Jane isn't always the best with this particular kind of emotional situation.

"Of course." She says, looking at you so very seriously. "I'll always defend you, John. You're my cousin and I love you."

"Love you too, Janey." You say, smile more genuine now.

Both of you get back to work, but your mind is still on the hooligan.

Hm. Maybe you should do something about this.

* * *

 

"Alright, John, let's try this again." You say into your phone. It seems that dear Johnny is upset by something or other, which is obviously an issue, but you can't quite manage to piece together what it is. All you're sure about is that it involved a hooligan and something that may or may not be about plants and sex? Something about knitting was tossed in there, as well.

Kanaya raises an eyebrow at you, looking up from her sewing. You shrug. She nods in understanding. Fair enough. She's dealt with John plenty, and even secondhand dealings are enough when it comes to John Egbert.

"Oh, it's Johnny boy?" Roxy says, looking up from her book. "Gimme!"

She reaches for your phone, which you hand to her with no further debate. You pick your knitting back up. Now, where were you? Ah, right. There you are.

Roxy makes a variety of humming noises into the phone and occasional adds in a comment, such as "Ha! You've got balls, Johnny-cakes!" or "Yes, go Janey!" or even "Maybe sticking an ear of corn up his ass would convince him?" which, honestly, could either be Normal Roxy Talk or in context. You're not sure which you prefer.

"Hey, Rosie?" Roxy says. "Can you knit something for Johnny?"

"Depending on what it is and the reason why, I should be able to make time." You say.

"She'll do it!" Roxy says, then hangs up your phone and hands it back to you. "Thanks, Rose. It was nice to talk to Egboy again."

"Certainly." You say, then select John's contact. "Alright, let's try this again."

* * *

 

"Okay, so should the hat be trans pride or should the scarf be trans pride?" You ask from your position on Rose's couch, a long familiar place for you. "Because I want one to be pan pride, too."

"It's your decision, Dave." Rose says from her chair, clicking her knitting needles steadily.

"I think I'll go for the scarf being trans pride." You say. "I'll wear it more often. The hat might mess up my hair."

"You are a ludicrous human being." Rose says, not even bothering to look up.

"And we're a matched set, so what does that say about you?" You ask.

"It says fuck you. Fuck you is what it says." She says, but you know there's a smile on her face.

The door opens, then, and you pop your head up to see who it is.

"Oh, hey Kanaya." You say. "What's up?"

She looks tired, which makes sense, since she just came back from work. The expression on her face is best described as exhausted resignation, you think.

"Dave," She says. "Will I ever be able to sit on my own couch again?"

"Probably not." You and Rose answer together.

Kanaya sighs.

* * *

 

"This doesn't seem strange to you at all, does it?" You ask as you stretch the knitted hat over your head. It fits comfortably, not itchy at all, though you don't even want to imagine how your hair will look when you take it off.

"Not really." John says. "I mean, I've done way weirder stuff. And this is for a good reason!"

"I'm not arguing that point," You say. "I'm a big fan of advocacy and activism. You should've seen me in high school, especially my senior year. No one was safe from the pride, John. No one."

He laughs as you both shrug your coats on.

"I can only begin to imagine, Karkat." He says. "Must've been an interesting time. Ah, it makes me wish I had started doing this stuff ages ago!"

"It's alright that you're starting late." You say, draping his scarf around his neck. "So long as you do start. I'm proud of you, John."

"Thanks." He says, giving you that soft-warm-wonderful smile.

You give him a gentle kiss in response, then you pull away.

"Much as I'd love to stand here making out all day, we'll never live down being late." You say, tossing your own scarf on.

"True!" John says, throwing an arm over your shoulder as your walk out into the hallway. "This'll be fun."

"That's certainly one way to describe it." You say, one eyebrow raised.

* * *

You think that you have never felt quite so strong and proud as you do in this moment.

The six of you are walking down the streets of this city, all bundled up in coats and gloves and hats and scarves. The hats and scarves are courtesy of your dearest partner, the talented Rose Lalonde.

Your hat and scarf match her own (rainbow is not a pattern you would suggest in other circumstances, but this is a special sort of time), which is a certain kind of satisfying. Jade is wearing a hat that matches John's, but her scarf matches the one Rose made for Jake. John's hat and scarf match each other, and Dave and Karkat have contrasting matches.

"I cannot believe we match Karkles." Dave says. "This is just so great."

"We don't match, you complete and utter wafflefuck." Karkat gripes.

"Okay, yeah, we don't," Dave says. "But it's even better this way."

"Shut up," Karkat says, but it lacks the bite you know he's only vaguely reaching for.

"That's not very probable." Jade says.

"See?" Dave gestures to Jade. "She gets it."

"She'd have to get it to be married to you!" Karkat says. Rose chuckles from her place next to you. You glance down and see her fond expression, which warms your heart.

"Rude." Dave sniffs, turning his head very deliberately and putting an arm around Jade. "Ignore him, babe."

"He does have a point." Jade says. She giggles rather adorably at the dramatically offended look Dave offers her.

"Chill out," John puts in. "If anyone's matching, it's Rose and Kanaya."

"Well yeah, of course the lesbians match!" Dave says. "But Karkles and I have two different pride points and we match on them!"

"Yes, congratulations Dave." Rose says. "You have truly found camaraderie in another pansexual transman existing. I'm sure you're the only two in the world."

"Rose, you are totally missing the point." Dave says. "I know we're not the only two, but I know so few people! What are the odds of matching up with one of the, like, ten people I actually associate with?"

Jade opens her mouth, and without looking, Dave puts one gloved finger over it.

"Shhh, Jade." He says. "Don't answer that."

She rolls her eyes, but you notice the fondness in her every move towards him. Your heart becomes impossibly warmer.

* * *

It's quite the fashion trend they've started. You can't deny the pride you feel, both a farther reaching sort that comes because these children, this next generation, is stepping up to do even more than you could have ever dreamed, and a more specific burst of pride for your niece's fiancée. She truly did a wonderful job on these hats and scarves.

You pull your own scarf around your neck into a perfect bunch, just covering the gap of exposed skin left by your low coat collar. It's not what you would have selected for yourself based on aesthetic, but this is not about aesthetic. It's about pride, which you have in spades.

You glance at the clock as you walk out the door. You're just on time, and Porrim appears to be, as well. You slip into the passenger's seat of the car.

"Hello, dear." You say.

"Hello, mother." She responds, exiting your driveway smoothly. "Quite the fashion statement you're making."

"I could say the same to you." You reply. Your daughter smiles, shoulders straightening to better display the scarf around her neck.

"Rose outdid herself. These are wonderfully comfortable, and I believe this is quickly becoming my favorite piece of aromantic merchandise." She says, pleasure radiating from her in a way that it has since she was a child.

"I can't disagree." You say, fingering the scarf lightly. "Kanaya has found herself quite the match."

"She has." Porrim agrees. "Speaking of, are you going in on Kanaya's bachelorette night?"

"Oh yes," You say, unable to keep the grin off of your face. "I certainly am."

Porrim laughs.

"Wonderful."

* * *

"Thanks, Rose."

Rose turns to you quicker than her facade usually allows. You continue staring ahead of you, pleased and proud smile obvious on your face.

"You're welcome, John. But you should really take credit for this, also. It was your idea, after all."

"Eh," You say. "You did all the work. It's fine! I'm just glad it went so well."

You smile at her directly, now. You can see the understanding in her eyes as she nods. Good old Rose. Who would've guessed that you'd go so far? You remember coming out to her, how terrifying it was to try and figure yourself out, and now this! Now, a group full of people wearing scarves and hats that Rose made, showing off pride in their identities. It's just so completely fantastic!

You nod back to Rose, then go on and walk around. You catch sight of Dave (pan pride hat, trans pride scarf) with Jade (demi/graysexual pride hat, demi/grayromantic scarf), telling some kind of ridiculous story to Jake (aromantic pride hat and scarf). And there's Roxy (bi pride hat and scarf) with Jane (biromantic pride hat and demisexual pride scarf), one arm gently around Calliope (homoromantic pride hat and trans pride scarf), chatting with Dirk (homosexual pride hat and grayromantic pride scarf).

You see Kanaya (homosexual pride hat and scarf) talking with Sollux (bi pride hat and scarf), who you know is one of Karkat's family members, but you don't quite remember how? His family is very large and very confusing.

And there's Nepeta (pan pride hat and scarf), who is Karkat's cousin you're pretty sure, with some bigger guy who you remember from Karkat's birthday. You're not quite sure who he is, to be honest. One of Nepeta's friends? Yet even he is in a pansexual pride hat and an aromantic pride scarf.

You're really enjoying this. You were never really involved in the community before. Your realizations of your own sexual and romantic orientations were so spaced out and odd for you, and honestly, your romantic orientation isn't so important to you. You identify much more as asexual than as bi/panromantic. And you always felt sort of on the outside, as an ace guy. But you're really loving the feeling of camaraderie here, and knowing that all of these people would look any bigot straight in the face and refuse to change or pretend fills you with a very unique sort of joy.

"Hey, Fuckbert."

An unreasonably large grin spreads across your face.

"Hey, Karkitten." You say as you turn. He's smiling at you so damn gently, in this way that makes you feel like the most powerful person in the world and also the most fearful, with this fragile thing that is Karkat Vantas's heart in your hands.

"This is pretty cool, huh?" You say, one hand on his face, one hand in his.

"Yeah, you really pulled it off." He says, approval and pride in everything he's saying and doing. You put your forehead against his.

"Karkat?" You say, still smiling, looking into those wonderful rust-colored eyes.

"Yeah?" He says, wry smile, wry expression, wry tone.

"I love you." You say, kissing the tip of his nose.

"Love you too, moron." He says, closing his eyes briefly. Your heart is too large for your chest, too warm to be reasonable.

It's exactly what you never knew you always wanted, always needed. This moment is more perfect than you think any moment could be.

(You are proven wrong in approximately two hours, but just barely)

(You remember this day for the rest of your life, and not just because of the plans you make later)

(You remember how pleased you were, how every fiber of you fit for the first time)

(And six or seven or five months later, when there's rings on your fingers that promise to change to even better and more permanent ones at some later date, you still remember this day as so much more than mutual plans for a proposal)

(You remember this day for the rest of your life)

(And you will always love it.)

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments are adored and you can reach me on tumblr at: pennamepersona.tumblr.com
> 
> I love this verse so very much and I can promise to try my hardest to respond to asks about it. Also, if you leave prompts anywhere, I'll do my best and I'll be thrilled.
> 
> [Buy me a coffee!](https://ko-fi.com/A375K8Q)


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